Enjoy Yourself Stupid

Sally at The Ski Spa

A hot towel evokes the memory of Luc & Sven shredding a Black Diamond.

Stop thinking about the All-Star Game and focus...

The Missourians Have Compromised The Mission

Terry Terry Quite Contrary

The Sexual Predator Series

thanks Billy.

Dance Like You Mean It

Bill Gates Barn Dance

Poem for '67

start the year by skipping church

then name a battle after your home town

become part of the sleep freeze

astronauts keep dying

but now soldiers are planting seeds

so find Jimmy Hoffa while you still can

remember how greasy coups can tame kings 

imagine giant simians singing sad songs 

and all of a sudden the world contracts before your eyes

so sign up for a riot if you're so bored

squash secessions

lead people then spend their money

swap hearts with someone

and when all else fails blame it on the Mothman

or maybe black holes

And A Bull Dike Shall Set The Sun

Untitled No.927

Bio-Circuit Mugshot

He's the Number Two Guy at OCP. OCP runs the cops

And Then God Started Throwing Rocks At His Posters

Tru Dis

*1 Month Later & Steve Tells Me This Story Again

*yeah right Jeff Gilluly

When Can I Take This Cast Off?

Keep It Clean San Diego, It Aint Your Birthday Forever

#6

Show Me The Money Train

Cougar Salad

Try This On For Size

seriously ladies, im serious.

Welcome to Earth

Metal On Metal On Gaurd

Smoke Em If You Got Em

Hot Cakes: The Pregnancy Pact

A Little Surprise

Hoarders - Cutting Room Floor

Hi  Im a home schooled hoarding specialist.  I travel around with A&E and counsel people who cant get rid of stuff like oven mitts, mop handles, chicken bones, kids pools, vomit, and firearms.





Heres are my notes from this week.........

DOUG

Doug should consider giving Radio just a pinch of coke?  it might help even him out.

check for proof of adoption ASAP

this kid is throwing chairs like Sigourney Weaver in Aliens

the man appears to be hoarding "whites only" Barbies

look for an explanation as to why someone would need a 12 foot ladder inside their house.  no need for an explanation on the second ladder because there's no way it exists.  only a complete asshole would keep two 12 foot ladders inside their house.

the walls appear to be decorated like a used football helmet.  this could be stressful for Radio as it reminds him of high school

this might go smoother if Doug would admit that he and Clarence Gilyard Jr have someone spawned two children

i've uncovered Black Barbies.  this guy's like a filthy Harriet Tubman.

Doug is a 9 out of 10 on the anxiety scale

i'm a 9 out of 10 on the wanting to kill myself scale

i cant believe my coworkers wear ties to these things.  i wouldn't be able to keep them clean.

remember to get patent for 1-800-GOT-DRNK......  people can call in and tell stories about how they got drunk and did something uninteresting.

what if the Barbies are real people and we're all giants.  we'd be committing genocide.

i hope thats not the case



JUNE

the father makes me realize that Bill Hader could play anyone and be funny.  he should be on a stamp.

working with Tonya Harding.  she's an amazing hoarding specialist.  id like to milk her triple sow cow.

this woman's child is going to grow up and have an empty house with fold up beds, a vacuum robot, and a 10 foot diameter garbage disposal.

remind June of the old saying "home is where the heart is" if home is a camper and you love magazines.

June could get a small business license and become a thrift store for homeless people

Gnome Sweet Gnome

I shattered a Gnome then took the pieces home

I glued them together during nasty weather

I plastered the cracks and smoothed them right back

I painted the lines for a long long time

I sprayed it with gloss like Luther Vandross